Monday, March 17, 2008

Parenting 101

To read or not to read?  That's my big question and dilemma.

Is there one book that is the gospel truth to parenting?  Is there a must have that gives great tips on discipline, eating and what a child should be doing at each milestone?  Etc, etc, etc...
I keep thinking I need to purchase something and then read it like crazy.  My friends - Erin, Rachel and Molly in particular - keep telling me that parenting is all instinct.  REALLY!?!?!  I'm still waiting for my instinct to kick in.  
It's NOT that I don't know what to do.  I feel extremely comfortable and I love being around him.  I do.  However, there are some lingering questions/concerns in my mind:

1. He keeps spitting/yakking up.  (Not full fledge throwing up - just coughing and then puking a bit.)  Yesterday he did this for the fifth time in about a week.  Is he sick?  Is he allergic to something?  Are the foods we feeding him too rich? Should I immediately take him to the doctor?  Or is all of this completely normal?
2. Soft and gentle is the phrase we like to use in our house. Why?  Every once in awhile he'll scratch, hit or pull hair.  Is this typical of his age?  Am I creating a monster because we like to play a lot and be goofy? Should I be more subdued with him?  I certainly don't want him to be mean to others while playing.
3. Timeouts - This is in conjunction with question/concern #3 - Are they effective?  What is a good form of discipline besides spanking? (GASP!  I definitely don't want to be a spanker.  I keep thinking I discipline my students at school without hitting and they get the message.  Can't he?  Of course they are 12 and 13 year olds and he's not even two...But still.  I know there is a better way.  Right?)

This week will be our third week of becoming parents.  I know all parents get thrown into the world of parenting when having a child - this isn't a new "thing" for Mark and I.  I think I would be a better, more effective mom if I became more educated, though.  Should I run to Barnes and Noble and purchase What to Expect the Toddler Years? Or do you have a better solution?

Help!

1 comment:

mbain said...

Ah yes, the read or not to read debate! I can only tell you my experience, so take it for what its worth. For every tidbit that I've found to be helpful (ok, so maybe five tidbits), I've found something that didn't apply / I didn't agree with / whatever. I have always walked away more knowledgeable about the topic, however, either by the books' tips or my own thoughts provoked by the book. While I love many of Dr. Sears' philosophies (I think his toddler and discipline books are really good), some of his advice has been impossibly unrealistic. So my advice is to read away, but feel free to question and rely on your gut to tell you what's best. At the end of the day, you can always say "because I'm the mom, that's why!"